Girls Horse Club Blog

Ask GHC: Dealing With a Horse Bully?

Published by • Sep 14th, 2008 • Category: Ask Girls Horse Club, Lend a Hand

Ask Girls Horse Club

Last weekend I went to my friend’s farm. She is obsessed (or so I thought) with horses nearly as much as me. We went out with her mum. She rode her horse and I rode another, but when her mum went back and we went for a ride, she treated her horse so terribly I couldn’t believe my and ears!!! She was kicking it unneccesarily hard, shouting really loud and yanking the horse’s mouth! At one stage she pulled the bit so hard her horse opened its mouth and the bit slipped through to the other side. Then she had the cheek to tell me my hands were too low! I am really disappointed and I don’t know what to think. HELP!

Submitted by ponygalmaddy, age 13

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18 Nickers »

  1. ponygalmaddy,
    Omg that is so terrible. If you decide to ride with her again, maybe you should tell her gently at first then if she doesn’t get the idea a little louder that pulling on the horses tender mouth that way really hurts him. She may not know this, though from the sound of your story she just doesn’t care. Tell her that horses are not cars they have feelings and ask if she would like it if someone pulled this huge metal thing around when it was stuck in HER mouth. You may want to do this all as your tacking up so that you do not distract her and then maybe she won’t do it while your riding. Hope this helps!


    P.S. Good for you for caring, so people might just say, “Well it’s her horse, not mine” and forget about it!

  2. ponygalmaddy – I agree with Horsecrazz. You need to tell your friend that she’s hurting her horse. Traeting a horse unfairly is not neccessary. If she doesn’t listen, perhaps you should tell her Mum.

  3. her horse has a foot condition and if she walks on hard ground she limps its so sad, any way i did say Your pulling it out of her mouth but she just said Dont start!
    thanks for the davice xx

  4. ponygalmaddy-

    That is really mean. I really can’t believe she had the nerve to tell you that your hands were too low. Next time, try saying that she is being a little too rough with that horse. Remind her not to work her horse too hard because it has a little injury. Tell her that she needs to be more kind and gentle as well. Horses are living creatures and she has no right to do that.

    Good luck.

  5. ponygalmaddy: If she doesn’t listen to you, insist on talking to her. She needs to know she’s hurting her horse. Tell her what you think about her hurting the horses, your disappointment and that you aren’t completely clueless about riding and doesn’t need her advice.

    The most important thing to know is that people change. Don’t let the fact that you two were great friends make you force yourself to be friends with her when she is so horrible to horses. Do what’s best for yourself and the horses. Good Luck!

  6. This is horrible! You need to tell someone! Tell her how you feel, and if she won’t stop, tell her mum and don’t ride with her again.

  7. it ius horrible then she carries on like nothing has happened, grr! im not sure what to say though?

  8. Just say you do not want to ride with her if she is going to be so aggressive when she is riding her horse. Try telling her that her horse would be much better for her if she was more gentle, maybe she’d like it if she knew she could get her horse to be good enough for shows :).

  9. I feel for you as well as the horse.I must say that if she won’t listen to you when you talk I can almost guarantee that she will not listen if you talk more forcefully, I t will just make you both mad.
    I would let her mum know what’s going on if she’s any kind of adult she will adress the problem.
    Good luck to the both of you!

  10. I know exactly what this feels like! It seems as if nowadays so many people focus on winning or getting a certain task out of the horse when maybe, the horse isn’t feeling so good that day? Or maybe he just wants to be asked nicely. I think some people should put themselves in the horses place. You know, horses have good and bad days, just like us. They have feelings, they aren’t some kind of robot that just turns on and off. Think about it…would you rather be slapped on or asked nicely?? Surely you would answer: asked nicely! I would just try and make sense to her that the horse has feelings too! And if she puts you down, please do not ride with her anymore. It’s simple as long as you aren’t rude about it, just let her politely know that you can’t stand to see her doing that to a horse, and maybe if she doesn’t learn, take action. If she wont give patience a try, notify her parents, or maybe even yours, or a riding instructor.

    Similar circumstances have happened to me before as well. I learned that if you just ignore the situation then nothing is going to change.

    Hope that helps! Sorry I sort of rambled on… :)

  11. WHAT!!! my horse keesha would bitethat person not that shes mean though.So was it the girls mom or the girl? well other than that what a horrible way to treat a living thing oh at the site of that i would be saying something but i am not trying to make you do anything so i hope you say something!

  12. thanks guys i have told i think its wrong and she just comes out with smaRT alic replies.

  13. well thats just rude

  14. I do not like it when people mistreat their horses. You should tell that girl that God wants us to care for our horses, not hurt them!

  15. Have you told the girls mum? if she only does it when mums not there it must mean she knows she’ll get in trouble if she’s caught.
    If she must be suppervized then for the horse’s sake so be it!!! This must stop.
    I also think it would be harmful to just walk away right now, she would most likely just get more mad at her horse for ‘breaking up your friendship.
    I’ll be praying for ALL of you!!!

  16. thank you guys.i have ridden with her again. and i have told her my views. they just seem to go over her head, we swaped horses at the church and her mare is very hard to ride, but managed to handle it without kikcking her and shouting at her, but i can uderstand my friends annoyance, i have told her NOT to ride her on the rtoad because thats when she is ib pain. u htink she just ingorend me. but while i was riding her horse, she was on another pony she kicked it ridiculously, i had to SHOUT at her STOP kicking her, the mARE WAS BEING A LITTLE SILLY BUT THEN SHE SAID,well waht do you expect me to do? kepp jsut nudging her ( when she showed me her nudgin the mare she went forward lol, i felt very smug)

  17. Oh! That is so terrible! I see what everyone els is saying, but you may be thinking she may end your friend relationship if you tell her how to ride… All i can say is that I think you should say ” I dont think you should kick that hard. Your horse dosnt look very happy when you do that. Maybe you should try this…blahblahblah”
    Try it!

  18. Well…I’m very glad she got ‘owned’!!! xp
    Hopefully she’ll take this embarrisment as how you should REALY ride!